Staying True to You: When Other People’s Voices Get Too Loud.
Have you ever felt completely clear about something, only to have someone else’s words slowly pull you off course? Since October, I’ve been working at a local school. The students are in their last few months before heading off to university or out into the world. Part of me is so excited for them, university can be a wonderful experience. But you can also see the pressure they’re under. Exams. Expectations. Endless conversations about what they “should” do next. So many voices pointing them in different directions.
More than we’d like to admit, other people’s viewpoints cloud our decisions. When we’re young, we’re influenced by our parents, our teachers, the people closest to us. That’s just part of how we learn. But at what point do we start trusting our own instincts? Our own inner knowing?
To live authentically. Staying true to yourself. Your values. Your path, even when it doesn’t look like anyone else’s. That’s where it can get a bit uncomfortable.
When Other People’s Voices Get Too Loud
I read a story this week that Jay Shetty shared, not my usual source of inspiration, but the timing was just right. It was about a man travelling with his son and a donkey.
As he passed different people along the road, each one had a different opinion about how he should be travelling. Let his son ride the donkey. Don’t ride the donkey. He should ride it. Both ride it. Walk alongside it. And each time, he changed what he was doing based on the opinion of whoever he’d just passed.
How many times have you done exactly that? Changed your mind, your plans, your direction, because somebody else had a view on it, and for whatever reason, we allow ourselves to be swayed.
I have done this more than I’d care to admit. I’m a people-pleaser. Wanting everyone around me to feel okay, sometimes at the expense of or ignoring what feels right for me. And honestly, a lot of that comes from my own insecurities, my own lack of self-confidence. Particularly in those moments when I’m not feeling my best, when I’m a little vulnerable, a little off-balance.
Does any of that sound familiar?
Because when we’re not feeling grounded in ourselves, that’s exactly when other people’s opinions can take hold. Everything feels harder. Less clear. Like you’re wading through something. And the trust in your own instincts, your own knowing, quietly slips away.
That little voice inside, the one that starts as a whisper, gets louder the more you ignore it. It just keeps nudging.
What the Research Says
It isn’t just a feeling either. Researchers at the University of Waikato in New Zealand found that consistently living out of alignment with who we are is genuinely linked to higher levels of depression. What I found really interesting is that the same research showed that mindfulness practices can actually protect against that impact.
Which makes complete sense when you think about it. The more present we are with ourselves, the harder it is to lose ourselves in other people’s opinions.
If you’d like to explore this further, finding your authentic voice through mindful communication goes into this beautifully.
The Tools That Help
I’ve found that when practised regularly, yoga, meditation and mindfulness help me cope with the demands of daily life. But more than that, they create the space and clarity for that inner knowing to come through.
The noise quietens. And your own voice starts to come through louder and more clearer.
I’m not talking about hours spent on my yoga mat. I’m talking about small, consistent moments of stillness that over time, shift something quite profound. As you develop your practice, that self-awareness starts to show up in everyday life too. You become more attuned to yourself, to the people around you, to when something feels right and when it doesn’t.
So when things get noisy, too many opinions, too much scrolling, too much of everyone else’s life coming at you, create space to actually hear yourself. Because clarity doesn’t come from the noise. It never does.
Your path might not look conventional. It might not make sense to everyone around you. But when you’re living it honestly, even the hard bits feel more manageable.
A Mindful Moment to Try This Week
Try to find just 5 minutes each day for stillness. It might be right after you wake up, or a quiet pause with an afternoon cuppa, without the usual distractions. Maybe a walk without your phone. My favourite time is in the mornings, when everything is still quiet and I’m still in my pyjamas. Just five minutes.
As Carl Jung once wrote,
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.”
If you enjoyed reading this, you may also like to read…
Finding Your Authentic Voice Through Mindful Communication
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